Dispute over car handle reaches supreme court

cardoorhandle                             Boisley NC – An argument involving a car handle erupted into a nation wide debate this week, when Thomas Dudley, 32, and Matt Pintrest, 35, brought a minor case to the supreme court. The case involved Dudley and Pinterest, who are two good friends, and an old Honda Civic. According to public records, the Honda Civic is registered in Dudley’s name. The initial argument occurred on a Wednesday night, after Dudley allegedly promised to give Pinterest a ride home from work. Dudley then allegedly had trouble maneuvering the key in opening the drivers door. Dudley claims that while he was attempting to open the car door, Pinterest kept “obnoxiously jiggling the passenger handle, like a little girl.” As a result of Pinterest’s impatience, the passenger handle snapped off. Pinterest refuses to accept responsibility for the damages claiming that “This is a societal issue. People always jiggle the handle while the car is being unlocked. There is no fault in that. It is what any reasonable man would do. We as Americans, have a right to jiggle handles, and thus have a right to be impatient as well.” The claim sounds preposterous at first glance, but the Supreme court has decided to take it. “Impatience is the cornerstone of the modern American lifestyle” said Justice Stevens, “If we weren’t impatient to get out of England to escape tyranny, there wouldn’t even be an America.” The Supreme court has announced that speculations on this case are being made, and the case will go to trial immediately. – Staff

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